Marriage and Manhood

1 month ago I saw my bride through my tear-filled eyes.

Our wedding did not go as we planned. Our guest list was cut down from 200+ to 22. We did not have the big venue we envisioned. We did not have a DJ. We did not have a beautiful honeymoon on an island.

It sure did not go as we planned. But it went as God planned. And because of that is was everything we could have hoped for.

We had an intimate ceremony. Thanks to technology our family and friends were able to watch us live. We had an amazing backyard reception. We had a nice big speaker and spotify. We ate great food. We road tripped back to our new apartment. Everyone was safe. We felt the Holy Spirit every minute of that day.

In this 1 month of marriage, I have learned a lot about what it means to be husband.

1 month and you know so much? I am definitely no expert, but day by day I am learning about what it means to be a husband.

1. SACRIFCE

It’s easy to envision what sacrifice means to any man. Usually it is a picture of taking a bullet to the chest. It means pushing someone out of the way and sacrificing your life for them. In marriage however, sacrifice seems to me to be about dirty dishes. As the priest mentioned in our wedding day homily, “lifting the seat” is a large part of marriage. Sacrifice is making the morning coffee when exhausted. It is listening before speaking. To be a man, a husband, is to die to self. To let go of how one believes things should be done, listen, and respond as a team.

2. GROWTH

Never stop growing personally and together as a couple. I noticed myself not pursuing growth the first month of our marriage. To me it seemed like now that we were married, I did not need to keep striving to be a better person. This is far from the truth. I know now that the pursuit of personal growth is the spark for growth as husband and wife. In order to be the best husband, it requires a constant look inward. A constant reflection: How can I be a better man? Am I living a life of virtue? Where am I slipping up?

3. JOY

There is so much joy in being with someone that makes you a better person! In this 1 month of marriage I have witnessed the pure fun that is doing life with someone who helps you grow closer to Christ. I have learned that it is okay to take moments to just rest in the joy of matrimony.

Overall, manhood to me means love. Being a husband means living a life of love for another. It means sacrificing in small ways everyday.

It means walking with your bride towards Heaven.